


You've Got to be Joking

by CianTheMighty



Category: Persona 3, Persona 4, Persona Series
Genre: Akihiko is the SEES group bicycle, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Deepthroating, Finger Sucking, Frottage, Glory Hole, M/M, One Shot, Oral Sex, Rough Oral Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-12
Updated: 2019-01-12
Packaged: 2019-09-18 18:04:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,673
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16999968
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CianTheMighty/pseuds/CianTheMighty
Summary: Akihiko makes a suggestion that catches Shinjiro off guard. Dojima works out some of his frustration on a stranger.





	You've Got to be Joking

Shinjiro coughed awkwardly to hide his initial shock. Akihiko only looked at him; a familiar, challenging expression on his face filled Shinjiro with dread. "You've... got to be joking," Shinjiro eventually replied. "Did you hit your head on the way down here? Did you get a concussion in that brawl you told me you and Kurosawa got into?"

"I don't have a concussion," Akihiko retorted, pouting. "Why do you always think that I have a concussion? Am I offending your delicate sensibilities? Is it that hard to believe that I genuinely want to do something like this?"

"Why?" Shinjiro rolled his eyes. "Why do I always think you have a concussion? You tell me, you fuckin' adrenaline junkie. You're the basket case who brought his fists to an actual gunfight." He was only half joking about the concussion. It was a serious risk with a guy like Akihiko, who had grown up to be the kind of guy to pick fights with South American street gangs. He seemed to have mellowed out somewhat since those high-level Shadow incidents in Inaba, but it couldn't hurt to be sure.

"That was one time," Akihiko said hotly. "Okay, maybe twice... but that scuffle in South America hardly counts. You had to know right off the top that this place has a shady reputation. Honestly, Shinji. I thought you would know more about this place than I do. What did you think we were doing when we came to this side of town?"

"I was mostly trying to figure out why a stiff like you--"

"Stiff in training," Akihiko pointed out.

"I was trying to figure out why a fuckin' stiff in training like you would have business anywhere near Shirakawa Boulevard," Shinjiro finished, scowling at Akihiko. "Jesus, Aki. Cop training with Kurosawa-san is putting some fuckin' sick ideas in your head. Does he have a guidebook on all the shady shit you can get up to in Iwatodai? How did you even find out about this place? Did you Google places to get your rocks off on the down-low?"

"I came here with SEES, once."

"You did a what, now?" Shinjiro blinked. That was a real shocker... if it was true. "You did not take those kids to a fuckin' glory hole. Mitsuru would have pitched a damn fit!"

"Mitsuru would have executed me on the spot," Akihiko corrected him seriously. "We actually went to that Love Hotel across the street."

"What the Hell were you doing at a Love Hotel?"

"It was a mission, actually," Akihiko explained, laughing. "You remember those huge Shadows, the messed up ones that showed up outside of Tartarus every full moon? There were two of them entrenched in the Love Hotel. Junpei pointed this place out to me while we were waiting for the others to gather."

"Oh, so Iori was the one to Google it."

"I guess so?" Akihiko shrugged. "I assumed he had it from a rumor. Either way... I doubt Detective Kurosawa would even know about a place like this. He's got connections, don't get me wrong... and he can be easygoing about a lot of stuff..."

Shinjiro snorted. "Supplying high school students with battleaxes, explosives, and body armor with 'no questions asked'..."

"... but he's totally above board with everything else," Akihiko finished, rolling his eyes. "Battleaxes aside, he's not that kind of guy. Honestly, I can't see him even knowing about a place like this."

"If you say so," Shinjiro replied, not really all that interested in Kurosawa's character. He was bored with waiting. The tiny stall left him with no room to stretch his legs.

Kurosawa was that police officer who supplied SEES with weapons, back in the days when the Dark Hour and Strega were still a threat. Shinjiro understood that Kurosawa had taken a job with the Shadow Operatives; some anti-Shadow task force that Mitsuru had started up with government funding. It was fucking weird that the government had even funded the effort against this occult stuff. Kurosawa, for his part, was supposed to be some kind of inside man. Cop politics. It was all bullshit. Kurosawa was probably still in Inaba working cleanup duty with that local cop. Ryutaro? Ryotara? Whatever.

Shinjiro had only caught some of what happened to Akihiko over in Inaba. From everything Akihiko told him... he was kinda glad he missed it. It freaked him out, sure, to know how close the world had come to ending... but he trusted his friends. How could he not? Shinjiro had been in a coma at the time... but from what he understood, a close friend from his days in SEES had basically flown up the moon's vagina to fist-fuck a space alien death deity thing. Total badass she had been... she stood there while the moon belched fire on her, and still got up to fight. Knowing shit like that kinda lent itself to trust. His friends were nothing if not reliable. Besides... he could either trust in their strength, resign himself to the world ending, or he could call up Mitsuru and offer to help. He knew his role; it wasn't terribly complicated.

"Hey, uh..." Akihiko trailed off, hesitant to speak. He seemed even more nervous, somehow, which Shinjiro suddenly understood was his fault. "Are you really good with doing this, Shinji? You know that nobody's here yet. We can still back out."

"Nah," Shinjiro replied, shaking his head. He threw that same challenging look back at Akihiko. "You can't scare me off that way."

"Good," Akihiko smirked at him. "I can't lose to you, anyway."

"Shit..." Shinjiro wanted to groan and smirk at the same time. He settled for shaking his head.

It was a while longer before either of them heard footsteps. Akihiko gave a nervous twitch at the staccato tap of leather shoes on rough concrete. Shinjiro bit his lip. Akihiko was seriously on edge about this... and they had just lost their chance to back out. Akihiko seemed to have the same thought. He pressed his ear to the door if the stall and gestured for Shinjiro to be quiet. Shinjiro needed no encouragement; the last thing he wanted to do was get caught on the other side of a glory hole. Shinjiro shook his head. He and Akihiko had messed around before... but Shinjiro had never seen him so excited about the prospect of sucking a dick.

Shinjiro's ears perked up when he heard a voice. "Here we are." It was a man, obviously. He sounded unimpressed. "You coming, or not?"

It was so strange... Shinjiro could have sworn the voice was a familiar one, but he was having a hard time placing the person. _Sounds like two people, at least._ Akihiko's eyes widened at the sound of the voice. "Shit. Oh, shit...! Abort, Shinji! We can't do this!"

Shinjiro chuckled. "You scared already?"

Akihiko shook his head. "It's not him. There's no way it's him."

"What, you know the guy?"

"You can stop acting like this is some kind of surprise," a second voice replied. "I know what kind of place this is. Are you being serious right now?"

"I wanted to try it," the first voice said defensively. Shinjiro smirked. It was like a mirror of Akihiko and himself. "Am I offending your delicate sensibilities? You can always look the other way if it makes you uncomfortable. I was the one who dragged you out here, Dojima. If getting your rocks off like this is beneath you... there's the door."

Shinjiro frowned in recognition of the name. _Dojima? That cop from the Inaba case? What the Hell is he doing in Iwatodai?_

"You have some strange ideas about how to unwind," Dojima complained. He sounded exhausted. "I just want to go home."

"Come on," the first voice teased. "Don't you ever get curious about places like this?"

"Not really," Dojima replied. "Inaba has them... but the town is so small that everyone knows everyone else. You could never get away with it because the person on the other side of the hole is bound to be someone you know." Shinjiro fought the urge to laugh. Dojima was judgmental as Hell... but he sure seemed to have spent a long time thinking about it. "You are still a cop, Kurosawa," Dojima continued. "You want to put your career on the line to satisfy your curiosity? Go right ahead. How do you even know if someone is on the other side of the hole?"

"Good question," Kurosawa murmured.

"Shit..." Akihiko hissed between clenched teeth. "Shit, shit, shit, Shinji..."

Shinjiro couldn't stop grinning. This was too good. There was no way he was letting a chance like this slip. Akihiko had a slip of paper clenched in his right hand. Shinjiro snatched it away from him and pushed it through the hole before Akihiko had a chance to change his mind. It was a quick note that Akihiko had written to smooth things along if anyone actually did show up. Akihiko glared at him in a panic, rooted to the spot. Shinjiro pressed his finger to his lips to silence him.

"You gotta do it," Shinjiro urged him. "He's clueless. There's no way you can't do this."

"It's _Kurosawa_ ," Akihiko hissed.

"Nervous?" Shinjiro wondered. "Come on, Aki. There is no way that he's gonna know it's you. Get up on that dick; you know you want to."

"I guess someone is there," Kurosawa told Dojima. "Look at this. She put a note through the hole." Shinjiro rolled his eyes. _Never knew he was that naive._ "Hey, boys," Kurosawa read aloud. "Waiting for you on the other side. Can't wait to get my lips around-"

"Okay," Dojima groaned. "Stop reading it. We get the idea."

"Slut," Shinjiro teased. "You kiss your mother with that mouth?"

"It is Kurosawa," Akihiko reasoned. "Do you want him to know it's us? It's better he thinks its a woman.

"It's up to you, Dojima," Kurosawa was saying. Shinjiro heard the soft thump of a shoulder bag being dropped against the wall. He heard the clatter of a belt buckle. "I know you have your small town values and I respect that. It can't be that bad if she's offering it straight up. See the note? She wants to do it. What do you have to lose, apart from some time?"

"Stop talking so much," Dojima complained. "I'm complicit now, thanks to you. Get this over with before somebody sees you."

"If you insist," Kurosawa replied, chuckling.

"What the shit, man..." Shinjiro breathed. "He's really gonna--"

"Ah." Akihiko blanched at the purr of a zipper on the other side of the hole. He was in a position to see through the hole. Shinjiro caught him licking his lips and he had to smile. From the sound it seemed like Kurosawa had to shift a bit to get the right angle. He pushed it through, and it flopped a little as it came out on the other side. It was partway hard already, which made Shinjiro want to laugh. Kurosawa had been anticipating something. Akihiko seemed nervous to touch it; he probably didn't think he was allowed. Shinjiro encouraged him quietly until Akihiko, slowly and tentatively, reached out.

"Oh!" Kurosawa hissed. His cock twitched at the skin-to-skin contact. "Here we go."

"There you go," Shinjiro cooed, whispering into Akihiko's ear. "Bet you never thought you would get your hands on that bit of meat, huh? How many times have you thought about this? Have you seen it before? Were you wondering what it would taste like? You can taste it now. I bet you want to taste it while you have the chance."

"Ah..." Akihiko murmured, stroking it delicately. Kurosawa was big enough that Akihiko had a hand and a half to play with, even on the other side of the hole. His voice was amplified by the acoustics in the room. Akihiko was emboldened by the sound of soft groaning - even Shinjiro was feeling it, watching Akihiko touch Kurosawa like this. He adjusted his position so that he could look Kurosawa's cock head on. Shinjiro had to move a bit to give him room. Akihiko had a strange look on his face as he licked the underside of the shaft. Sliding his tongue from base to tip, he closed his lips onto the head.

"Shit..." Kurosawa murmured appreciatively. "Here we go... I think she likes it."

"Stop talking," Dojima grumbled.

"Now look who's getting all flustered," Kurosawa teased. "Her offer included you too, Dojima. Too bad it's just the one hole, eh?"

"Just hurry it up."

Shinjiro grinned. For a whiner, Dojima didn't seem all that reluctant to be here. Kurosawa chose that moment to start moving, tentatively at first. His breathing was a little ragged; he was probably trying to make this last. Akihiko, nervous as he was, took Kurosawa in deeper. Shinjiro was impressed. That cock head was probably tickling the back of Akihiko's throat by now. Akihiko was doing his best to make his lips touch pubic bone. Kurosawa grunted amiably and gave an eager thrust. Akihiko choked spectacularly on the intrusion... but he did not back down.

"Did she just...?" Dojima had a strange tremor in his voice.

"Heh," Kurosawa chuckled. "Sorry about that, babe. I lost control of myself."

Akihiko's lips were red and swollen, slick with spit and dribbling precome. His cheeks were flushed red, and he was panting. Shinjiro was hardly better off; he was palming his own crotch while he watched Akihiko suck. He was debating whether or not to take his cock out and jack it in the stall. Akihiko started to hum while he worked; the vibrations reverberated in the room, mixing with the soft groans that Kurosawa made, and...

Shinjiro decided he didn't care. Akihiko was being incredibly hot, and it was his fault that Shinjiro was like this. Shinjiro slipped his pants down as quietly as he was able. Akihiko looked away from him shyly. _How are you even modest right now?_ Shinjiro was amazed. Kurosawa was close; he made no secret of that fact. He gave another rough thrust, and another, and another. Akihiko took them bravely. Shinjiro was crouched behind him with his legs spread; he pushed Akihiko's shirt up and pressed his cock into the skin of his back. It was too much. Skin-on-skin contact was all it took to set Akihiko off.

Akihiko raised his hips as if to suggest something more. Shinjiro dutifully pulled his pants down to expose Akihiko's ass. He rubbed his cock between Akihiko's cheeks, close to penetrating but never quite getting there, moistening the area with streaks of precome and handfuls of saliva. His ass was downright _sloppy_. Shinjiro moistened his fingers, pressing them inside. Akihiko was so riled up at this point that he would probably agree to anything.

God, Kurosawa was loud!

He wasn't vocal, which was probably a blessing. He was a rough fucker. Everything he did had an echo in the room. "Here we go..." Kurosawa muttered. He was light of breath, which probably meant that he was close. "Here we go... here we go, ah God here it comes... oh, God, Fuck!"

Kurosawa was banging so hard that the wall of the stall rattled in its rigging. Akihiko choked savagely as Kurosawa came down his throat. Shinjiro was fucking proud of him; Akihiko never backed down, even once. Kurosawa wilted a little as he pulled out of the hole. Shinjiro heard him waddle over to the sink. He cleaned himself up, tucked his cock away, and zipped up.

"Holy shit..." Akihiko groaned. "I can't... I can hardly breathe." His cock was throbbing angrily between his legs. Shinjiro was just about ready to pounce.

"You ready to go?" Kurosawa asked Dojima, who said nothing for a while. Shinjiro had to grin at that. Kurosawa was so damn loud that Dojima would have heard everything no matter where he stood.

"You have some strange ideas about how to unwind," Dojima complained.

"S-Sorry," Kurosawa replied. "I guess that was a bit over the top..."

"Shut your damn mouth and keep watch for me," Dojima snapped. Akihiko and Shinjiro both froze.

"Wait, what? Are you serious?" Kurosawa seemed surprised.

"Stand by the door or something and keep watch," Dojima grumbled, crossing the room in three steps and ripping his zipper down. He was angry, and hard. Had listening to Kurosawa gotten him that way? Shinjiro was impressed; every time this Dojima person opened his mouth, they were forced to re-evaluate their opinions. First he was a stiff, then he was a prude... then he was an alpha dog in sheep's clothing.

"Oi," Kurosawa snapped. "Careful where you flash that thing."

"You have no right..." Dojima punctuated his speech by shoving his cock into the hole, "... to say that to me."

"Oh, God..." Akihiko groaned as he stared nervously down the barrel. It was beautiful... big, and beautiful.

"I don't want your mouth," Dojima murmured. If Kurosawa heard him, he didn't say anything. "Whoever you are on the other side of this thing... just give me a warm hole, will ya? I'll do all the moving. You're probably gonna want to relax as much as possible."

"Fuck..." Shinjiro grinned. This Dojima person was hot _and_ bossy. Fortunately, Shinjiro had just such a "warm hole" in mind. Akihiko's mouth was all sore, anyway.

"I want to do it," Akihiko breathed, apparently on the same page as Shinjiro. "Fuck, Shinji... let me get fucked by this guy. My ass is burning and his dick is just..."

"Beautiful," Shinjiro agreed, a little envious. "Bon courage, ya pervert."

"You love it," Akihiko pointed out, grinning weakly. Snaking his hand between his legs, he fingered himself to get ready. He wouldn't need much. Shinjiro, acting on impulse, got his hand on Dojima's cock and gave it a lick. It was a good taste. He probed it with his tongue, looking for the guy's sensitive spots.

"H-Hey," Dojima complained. "That feels like a mouth. What did I tell you?" Shinjiro smirked. Akihiko was just about done fingering himself, anyway. It took a bit of maneuvering, but he got himself lined up with Dojima's dick. Keeping his eyes fixed on Shinjiro, he rocked his hips back and started to take Dojima inside. "O-Okay... that's more like it, keep that up," Dojima murmured appreciatively. "You have to relax. Open up a little or this is gonna hurt."

"He's right about that," Shinjiro whispered. "You gotta relax, Aki."

"Y-Yeah..." Akihiko groaned. "F-Fuck, Shinji... you gotta help me out. Blow me, give me something to do with my mouth, anything."

"Heh. It's tempting to suck you off, just to see you get more riled up," Shinjiro teased. Really, he doubted Akihiko could get any more riled up. "You want to get spit-roasted? I can do that for you. Come on... that's a cop's dick in your ass."

"I-I know that..."

"Is that something you like?" Shinjiro wondered. "Do you have a fetish for a man in uniform? Or do you like it better when he's out of the uniform?"

"J-Just--" Akihiko trailed off when Dojima started to move. "F-Fuck, Shinji... just suck my dick, already. Y-You gotta--" He trailed off again when Shinjiro pinned his upper half to the wall. His back arched, his mouth stretching open in a soundless yowl as Dojima nailed his prostate. Shinjiro brought his own dick in close, grabbing his and Akihiko's in the same grip. He kissed Akihiko - deeply, with tongue - his fist flying up and down like a piston. He dribbled spit on his hand to make the grip wetter as the flush in Akihiko's cheeks spread to his neck and collarbone.

"God..." Dojima growled. "Your ass is... it's incredible." Shinjiro grinned around Akihiko's lips. He knew it first hand; Akihiko's ass was something else.

"It's no fair that you get her ass," Kurosawa complained from the door. "Are you enjoying yourself?"

"Shut... up..." Dojima hissed, growling out his words between powerful thrusting. "I just... need... a minute..."

"Only a minute?" Kurosawa chuckled.

"Unlike some people," Dojima snapped, "... I want to get this over with." It was just as well, too. Shinjiro didn't think that he could keep Akihiko quiet much longer. "F-Fuck..."

"Get ready to blow, Aki," Shinjiro breathed, whispering into Akihiko's ear. "He's gonna come any minute, now. He's gonna come so _fucking_ hard he's gonna fill you up like there's even any room in there with that fucking _cock..."_

"C-Christ, Shinji...!" Akihiko stared, shocked - as if Shinjiro could shock him with that kind of talk - as his head went back. Dojima's hips snapped forward with an audible smack against the divider. He growled like an animal in heat; Shinjiro could tell by how hard he was breathing... Ryotaro Dojima wasn't nearly as impassive as he pretended to be.

Akihiko gritted his teeth. His lower lip wavered as his chest heaved, over and over. He was so caught up with the sensations in his prostate that he didn't even notice when he blew his load all over Shinjiro's hands. Shinjiro brought one of those hands to Akihiko's mouth, smearing come over his lips and smiling when he felt the flick of Akihiko's tongue.

Shinjiro's only clue that Dojima had finished was that he slowed his pace; that, and the way that Akihiko's eyes widened for no particular reason. He pulled out, roughly, and Akihiko sagged against the divider, a look of pure bliss on his face. "Not a word," Dojima snapped, stomping over to the door like a harrumphing housewife.

"Don't you worry..." came the reply, though their voices were already fading as they moved down the hall. Soon enough, Shinjiro could no longer hear their footsteps.

"Holy shit..." Akihiko groaned.

"Fucking Hell, Aki. Tell me you've got one more round in you."

"I can't even feel my legs," Akihiko replied, chuckling weakly. He wiped the sweat from his forehead with the back of his hand, letting out a deep, satisfied sigh. "Maybe... if you hold me up, we can..."

"Done."


End file.
